The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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