im drinking this country out of the recession.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
