who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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