whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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