DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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