You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
