the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
