Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
How's work?
Spinning.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Randomize