between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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