dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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