At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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