How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
