So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
