Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
