To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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