her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
