He is such a slut. More and more my type.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
