Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Randomize
