The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i think my mom watched the whole time
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
