It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
