biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
