We should be called the Road Head Warriors
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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