I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
