I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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