Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I think your dad took our porno
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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