Christians are straight up FREAKS
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
So much rum. So many feels.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
