PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
