ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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