where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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