quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
