The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
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