So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
