gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
