OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
oh god the rape fog is back!
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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