Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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