Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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