dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
