Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
