Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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