the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize
