New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize