so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
being pregnant is like rehab
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
