I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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