i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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