I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Randomize
