Define "chronic" masturbator.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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