There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize