I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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