Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
