Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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